Let’s face it – every day we are regularly bombarded with questions. When you’re an emerging media company in Nashville, people just want to know your take on everything. It’s only natural. And, since our duty is to serve the people, well, we have no choice but to be present. This is the SoBro way. Plus, aren’t mailbags a barrel of laughs anyway? Welcome to this slut’s newest weekly recurring feature: the SoBros Mailbag. As always, ask us these @SoBrosNetwork mailbag questions on Twitter, email them to me anonymously at email@example.com. And, damn it, I have to update that terrible introductory paragraph that I’ve been using literally ever since I started writing this column …
Did you know that giraffes and humans have the same number of cervical vertebrae?
– Sox, kid (@trtidwell) December 9, 2021
I didn’t know it, but that’s the beautiful thing about the SoBros mailbag. Every now and then we learn something new. I had to look for that, and here it is, it’s true.
Almost all mammals have the same number of cervical vertebrae, regardless of the length or length of their necks – humans, giraffes, mice, whales, and platypuses all have exactly seven cervical vertebrae. There are only three exceptions to this rule out of over a thousand genera of mammals – manatees (which usually have six) and the two living types of sloths (two-toed sloths typically have six, three-toed sloth nine).
The more you know.
If you had to go hunting but couldn’t pick up conventional hunting weapons (pistol, bow and arrow, etc.), what do you use?
– Frighteousjesse (@RighteousJesse) December 10, 2021
Big brain answer here, but I’m going to grab some binding supplies so that I can MAKE weapons in the wild – we’re talking glue, wire, and tape. I’m gonna find some crazy pebbles and sticks, tie them all together, next thing you know – boom, I have an ax I can bury in front of any creature I need to eat to survive.
If you had to season, what kind of seasoning would you be?
– b. (@brittbutspooky) December 10, 2021
It would definitely be Old Bay, and I think that’s why I love it so much. Old Bay and I have a bond. I can relate to Old Bay. It’s complex, a flavor all its own and daring. It pairs well with anything, and of all the seasonings, it also feels very laid back to me. I love Old Bay and I strive to live my life like this.
What are the official Top 5 @SoBrosNetwork Christmas Songs 2021?
– QuickSixerPodcast (@QuickSixerCast) December 10, 2021
I’m not gonna lie, Pat. I didn’t even know they were making new Christmas carols yet. I still listen to the same old ’40s shit every year. But, looks like our guy Steven was ready with his, so I’m going to let him answer that question on my behalf.
I feel like I have to add my 5 cents
Christmas in New York – Jose James
Christmas Don’t Be Late – Norah Jones
Christmas will truly be Christmas- Black Pumas
Small things – ABBA
It’s Christmas Motherfuckers- Logan Lynn https://t.co/TSN5FULtb4
– Steven McCash (@ MC_Cash75) December 10, 2021
The Christmas season has started. What do you think of White Elephant?
– Patrick Criswell (@PatCrizzy) December 10, 2021
I’m on board with this. Not only can this be a lot of fun, but it really takes the pressure off of trying to find a great gift for a coworker or someone you barely know completely far away. You just have to know your audience, you know? You can’t be the guy bringing the vibrator to the company’s White Elephant party.
Question from Adam on Facebook:
Long-time reader, poster for the first time …
Why are you so pretty
First of all, thank you for writing, Adam, and thank you for noticing. These beautiful appearances take a lot of effort – namely, at least two cups of coffee each morning, eat a whole bag of live chicken fillets, then go to Panda Express and end the day by staying up until 1 a.m. and sleeping for five hours. hours per night. This is the “Body by Stoney” program. Your hair will turn gray and your beard will look homeless in no time. This diet and lifestyle is the fastest way to reach the coveted daddy.
Keep asking questions – see you next week!
Stoney Keeley is the editor of the SoBros Network and a connoisseur of Dogs Playing Poker on Velvet. He is a strong supporter of the GSD team, #BeBetter and “Minds right, ass tights”. “Big Natural” covers the Titans of Tennessee, Nashville, Yankee Candle and a whole host of nonsense. Follow on Twitter @StoneyKeeley